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Romance Is Alive & Kicking

ROMANCE IS NOT DEAD. Thank goodness for that!

I posted on our Facebook page recently, a lovely romantic tale about a rickshaw driver in London on New Year’s Eve and how his kind act brought two strangers together.

With Valentines Day fast approaching love is everywhere and romance is thankfully very much alive and kicking.   It was certainly in the air before Christmas with Prince Harry’s announcement of his engagement.  That look of adoration and love for Meghan as he introduced her  to the world surely must have warmed the hearts of even the most cynical.

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I honestly believe that we all have the capacity for romance.   Often people get squeamish over romantic gestures but they don’t have to be cheesy, complicated or extravagant.   Real romance isn’t manufactured.  It’s very individual but once you’ve experienced it you won’t forget it. It’s a powerful force that makes you feel connected to someone in a deeper way.  It’s the gestures, both big and small, that make you feel especially touched and cherished by your partner.  Romance is what takes your relationship past friendship.

It’s showing the person you love that you’re thinking about them.  It shouldn’t feel forced.  There are no limits.  It can be shown by a handwritten note, by going for a walk, or even by making someone a sandwich.  Romance is simple, sweet and innocent that reminds your partner why they fell in love with you in the first place.

Romance is so not dead.   We just have to remember to be romantic.

Why Did I Become A Celebrant?

Why did I become a Celebrant?

The simple answer is, because I am dealing with love and meeting people at the most loved-up time in their life.  It is impossible not to make it sound anything other than corny, but it truly is a beautiful thing.

I hear a couple’s story and I can help them tell it however they like. Love is beautiful – actually, that doesn’t even come close to describing it.   And I make no apologies for getting caught up in experiencing a moment that is amazing.  I’m not, and I will never be – a ‘robotic’ celebrant.  I can’t imagine being a part of a wedding – where two people are expressing their enduring love for each other – and not being affected by it.   I’ve learned to take my own advice –  I tell my couples, when it becomes a bit overwhelming – take a deep breath – and soak in all the love that is around you.  There’s a lot of truth in Wet Wet Wet’s song ‘Love is all around us’

I feel it in my fingers
I feel it in my toes
The love that’s all around me
And so the feeling grows.

I won’t go on but you get the gist.  Don’t be ashamed if there are tears.  They are tears of genuine joy, emotion and happiness and everyone will be touched.   A moment’s pause may feel like a lifetime, however it reinforces that these special moments will last forever.  In the words of Dr Seuss “Sometimes you will never know the value of a moment until it becomes a memory”

Love quoteI’ve never considered myself as being overly romantic but I do think everything involved in the planning of a wedding is infectious, joyous and exciting.    For me, I feel hugely privileged to be involved and trusted with a story.  My couples share with me their most personal feelings and tell me about the most important people in their lives.  It is a huge responsibility that I welcome and respect.

There is a powerful, infectious feeling of love, anticipation, excitement and I take the responsibility of my position very seriously and it’s not uncommon when a couple first contacts me – for them to ask for examples of previous ceremonies I have performed.  I’m more than happy to do so… but it comes with a very specific direction: “Don’t focus on the words, focus on the intention.”

Why?  Because when I write a ceremony, it’s a personalised ceremony… and it is completely and utterly customised to the couple who it is written for.

When the ceremony is over and ‘my’ couple immerse themselves amongst their nearest and dearest, I go home with warmth in my heart and a huge smile on my face.  A job well done.

 

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Valentine’s Day Lamentations

At the risk of sounding like a grumpy old woman I’ve never been that keen on Valentine’s Day.  I fear it is turning into yet another commercial consumer racket.   Some people really feel the pressure for something extravagant to happen on 14th February and are weighed down by disappointment if doesn’t.  Furthermore, whether you are a teenager or adult looking for love and you don’t have a partner on Valentine’s Day, it can reinforce the very fact that Yes, you are on your own and there’s something wrong with that.

Whilst I was at 6th Form college studying (technically) for my A’ Levels, though if the truth be known I wasn’t doing much work …… I digress …… I was living with my bestie who just happened to be a boy magnet.  Both the years we shared digs  she received at least two bunches of flowers and the postman was weighed down with cards.  What did I get? A supposedly anonymous card from my dear father, kind but somehow it hit home even harder that I was somewhat lacking in the mysterious admirer or boyfriend department.

Valentine's Day, giving flowers, love, proposalsNick and I have just celebrated 25 years together and haven’t once given each other a card to celebrate Valentine’s Day. We’ve never really felt the need.   Having said that, some years quite unexpectedly he has gone out to the garden and hunted for a flower of some sort (quite a feat in February)  and then presented it to me as if it is the biggest bunch of roses you have ever seen.  It makes me laugh every time.  Having said that he is just as likely to do that on any other day of the year; in other words just because he feels like it.

My point is, don’t despair if you are on your own or there are no cards, chocolates, flowers or champagne. One day in February isn’t special but YOU are.

And if you are one of the lucky ones who gets proposed to on Valentine’s Day (or any day for that matter), many many congratulations and lots of love to you both.